The Ultimate Survival Guide: How To Kill a Spider

Do you live alone? Strongly dislike creatures with more than 4 legs..and no one close by to kill them for you? Here's a survival guide on how to remove them!!

This is what you need:

1) Something strong that will kill the sucker, without YOU having to squish them to death..this could be anything in liquid form that you can spray on the spider. I.e: highly flammable hair spray, deodorant, or..in my case....an anti-bacterial surface cleaner!
2) Lot's of paper..to remove the spider without feeling it's dead six-legged-body between your fingers..

Step 1: Observe target. Is it on the move? (if so, you must move quickly). If it's just hanging there (literally) then be aware that it may release more of its nasty spider "silk" and move further down..which.in my case it did...

Step 2: Spray the little sucker to death!! Do NOT, I repeat, do NOT be cheap on your poison of choice...this spider fought long and hard for its life. Remember that the result may be messy.

Note to self: remove valuable items, such as: watch, before spraying all over the place. 

Step 3: take lots of toilet paper, and flush the spider down the toilet. Important: do not throw it in the trash can, as doing this  allows the probability of it climbing back out if it didn't die after your gas-attack.

 And that's IT, guys! 3 simple steps! If I can do it, YOU can do it too!! Good luck! lol =P